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The Morning News

Friday, January 9, 2009

Currently: did you say mescaline?
Today’s Feature: “Cocktail Flu” by Eric Feezell
Latest in Digest: The Wasted Vigil
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Better Than Two in the Bush

We invited our readers to invent an idiom or proverb, and promised to emblazon it across a piece of merchandise that might ensure the phrase’s everlasting fame. The winning entry, “If a bird can’t fly, it walks,” was sent to us (and later illustrated) by the exceptionally talented Kevin Cornell, and is available now on a sticker suitable for display on the tail of your crapped-out Corolla, on the wall of your cube at your hopeless job, or above your workbench at home, where the real work is done.

If a Bird Can't Fly, It Walks

“If a Bird Can’t Fly, It Walks” Bumper Sticker
$2 USD

This vinyl sticker measures 8.5" x 2.5". To purchase, select a quantity and shipping destination below, and press “Buy Now.”

1 Sticker +  Shipping to USA/Canada (1-3 days) = $3 USD
Shipping to the Rest of the World (4-7 days) = $5 USD
Buy 5, Get 1 Free +  Shipping to USA/Canada (1-3 days) = $16 USD
Shipping to the Rest of the World (4-7 days) = $20 USD






TODAY’S FEATURE

Cocktail Flu

Experts answer what they know. The Non-Expert answers anything. ERIC FEEZELL offers tried-and-true excuses for calling in sick to work, including examples of the maladies we can claim to hide the malady we have.

LARGE PLASTIC BUTTONS

Our Favorite Gifts

The TMN writers share their most precious of presents.

NOW IN STORE

“Irritable Vowels”

The tee for exasperated spellers, designed by Jennifer Daniel. Available in women’s and men’s fits.

» SHOP NOW

DIGEST

The Wasted Vigil

Though world leaders continually misjudge their roles and responsibilities in dealing with Afghanistan, several writers are sharing valuable insights. Nadeem Aslam is one of them.