The Bitterest Pill
Her campaign beaten and bruised, Hillary won’t concede defeat, and proves she’s willing to do anything to get elected. With a comeback unlikely, our commentators wonder what she’ll try next—now and after the election.
John Warner
Running and Screaming
Give us a nominee or give us death. The Pennsylvania primary is here, and with it may come the end of our nightmarish nomination process. Kevin Guilfoile and John Warner on what’s truly making Americans bitter: politics.
The Hottie and the Nottie
As the battle for the Democratic nomination tightens, Kevin Guilfoile and John Warner look back at the candidates that have been left behind, theorize about what constitutes plagiarism, and wonder about the Clinton political monster that wasn’t.
If It’s Tuesday, This Must Be 2008
With Super Tuesday upon us, Kevin Guilfoile and John Warner assess the remaining field of competitors, have the audacity to hope, and break down the candidates into the kinds of VHS-or-Beta terms we can understand.
The Huckaboom and the Obamawagon
In the weeks before the 2004 election, Kevin Guilfoile and John Warner opped and edded their way through the debates, issues, and differences in hair. With just 299 days left in the 2008 race, they sharpen their quills.
I Write Camille Paglia's Next Column so She Doesn’t Have To, Vol. 1: The UFC
For those who still don't grasp the subtext, reifications of Anna Nicole, Ultimate Fighting, and Eddie Murphy.
Gender-Bending Grade-Schooler Attracts Notice
One local boy's locks sends shockwaves throughout his community, and a clear message to the world of fashion: The younger generation plays by a new set of rules.
John Warner's Datsun B210 Is Underpowered, Ugly
Power, speed, performance: You won't find them here. Our reviewer is forced to put this once-sporty 1978 model through its paces. Part of a series of reports on the life of our writer.
Boy's Pain Is Orthodontist's Pleasure
The X-rays and photos show beyond any doubt that one orthodontist's recently found treasure spells financial tragedy for a local family.
Breaking Bad Habits & Busting Balls
Another set of excerpts from a book whose author cannot be named for reasons apparent to anyone who has seen a Scorsese movie. This week: life lessons for children and meeting the don of the teacher's lounge.