The Complete Biography of North West
A baby is born to a celebrity couple. Meanwhile, many more babies are born to countless other non-famous couples. This is what happens next.
Kevin Fanning
15 Pop-Cultural Abysses From Which There Is No Escape
A New York City cop was sitting alone in his apartment. He was watching the new season of Arrested Development, which he had been very excited about. After years of saying “I hope they make an Arrested Development movie or perhaps another season of the show!” on his Twitter and
How Amanda Bynes and the Teens Saved the Human Race
But the internet was different—we were different—before she joined Twitter. Before she began to show us who we really are. We were still used to who Amanda had been. We did not understand who she was becoming. We expected her to be that skinny little girl with the
Cultural Literacy for Old People
Your eyes don’t totally glaze over when someone tells you the latest news about Chloe Moretz. Maybe you have a general sense that One Direction is a boy band? From England? Although who knows what their music sounds like. And in a lineup of Selena Gomez, Vanessa Hudgens, Miranda
How We Break Up
In most cases they seem to stretch well past the sell-by date of whatever relationship they were originally attached to. It makes sense, narratively. The part of the relationship where you like someone and hope they like you back, where you obsess over various interpretations of their texts and late-night
Behind the Scenes: Jennifer Love Hewitt's Breast Insurance Policy
While promoting the second season of Lifetime’s The Client List, the 34-year-old actress admitted to USA Today that she would consider getting her breasts insured. “I need, like, an insurance invitation. If somebody was like, ‘Hey, you know what? We would like to insure your boobs for $2.5
Worst Job Ever: Suri Cruise’s Doppelganger
A tiny little body double leading photographers away from wherever Suri wanted to be, the latest scam in a long line of scams that began with Tom Cruise’s portrayal of a heterosexual in Risky Business. Here are the facts: Last week, Katie picked Suri up from school and stuffed
How to Spend Valentine’s Day With the Celebrity of Your Dreams
If you’re like me, you’re busily fashioning a full-size model of Ryan Reynolds from ordinary household objects. The things we do for love, am I right? Not that a fake Ryan Reynolds doesn’t provide SOME comfort and pleasure on this, the most romantic day of the year,
The Perpetual Need for TV Characters to Make Out
The only hour of the week you can even stand to be alive, the only time you can focus on something other than the terrible skin covering your ungainly blob of a body, is Tuesdays from 9 to 10 p.m., when Moonlighting is on. Even though everyone else in
The Beautiful Dark Magic of Lip-Syncing
The year was 1989. The place: Lake Compounce amusement park in Bristol, Conn. Two young warlocks named Rob Pilatus and Fab Morvan were performing a complicated lip-sync with their coven, Milli Vanilli, when there was a problem with their backing track—the music skipped, and Rob and Fab momentarily faltered
Three Shades of Celebrity Desire
It was nice, for a while, imagining that love is real. Remember when we knew they were together but they were playing coy? Selena telling Ellen that Justin was like a little brother. (Yeah, a SEXY little brother.) Remember when they almost kissed in that “Call Me Maybe” fan vid?
The Impossible Expectations for Kim & Kanye's Baby
For every baby in your life, you had to endure nine months of updates. We’re pregnant! We’re getting the room ready! It’s a boy, or whatever! We’re already so tired! We’re registered at Target, go buy the baby a bunch of stuff and participate in
How the Dead Live
There's a peculiar odor to burning hope--it's the smell of exhaust fumes, human sweat, and a fast-food container interred under a seat cushion.
Baby’s First Internet
Not sure how to explain the internet to your young ones? Presenting a series of nursery rhymes to teach children how to comport themselves on the online.
How Everything Turned Out
When refugees from another planet make contact and ask for help, Earth's web geeks should help them, right? A tale of Non-Earthers, online social networks, and memorable sunsets.
Part Three
Continuing to pore through Charlotte's blog leads to some strange revelations, surprising moves, and a conclusion, of sorts.
Part Two
Discovering a co-worker's blog means having to find out if you've been written about. Along the way, however, you will learn things you weren't supposed to know.
Part One
In the first of a three-part fiction series, a co-worker exhibits intriguing new qualities, and life at the office gets shaken up.
The Heart Is Also a Furnace
I imagine Magdalen Powers living by herself in a tiny cottage in the middle of a deep forest. Birds and wolves prepare breakfast while she sleeps. During the day she goes skinny-dipping with Kelly Link. In the evening, James Tate stops by for tea and complaining about the human condition.
Are You Thinking What I'm Thinking?
I will forever remember The Like as the band that rocked so hard it made me stop caring about Liz Phair's downturn. Their new album, Are You Thinking What I'm Thinking?, has swooping, ethereal vocals, guitars that crash and swirl, and bass lines that make your
Popjustice
The best blog about British pop music that you're not reading is Popjustice. The writing is so hilarious and well crafted, it'll spoil you for all other music blogs. Haven't heard any of the artists they talk about? Doesn't matter: The language
The Clove Hitch
Want to impress those bougie jerks down at the marina? Skip the overhand knots and girth hitches favored by landlubbers. The proper way to moor your skiff is with a clove hitch. It only takes a few minutes to learn, and no amount of wind or waves will shake it
Worried About Celebrities
Experts answer what they know. The Non-Expert answers anything. This week: Sudden weight loss and sudden engagements abound. We take to the streets to find out which Hollywood celebrity's out-of-control behavior is causing people the most anxiety.
Untitled Fall Project
What to do when you and your sister are worth billions, on the brink of adulthood, and then your brand new movie flops? Go to college? Our Los Angeles reporter goes undercover to discover the starlets' new plans.
What I Did on My Summer Vacation
Not stuck in the back of a station wagon, but stuck in a doldrums with cheap hot dogs, hidden popsicles, and a soulmate lost. Kevin Fanning brings the words, Reuben Stanton brings the pictures.
Night-Blooming
Somewhere in Connecticut, two brothers speed down a darkened nighttime highway on a personal mission. A story by Kevin Fanning.
The Vanishing Act
Normal evening routine: Your sister goes to her room, closes the door, and falls asleep. Normal, that is, until you never see her again. New fiction by Kevin Fanning, illustrated by Joshua Allen.
11 Stories About Cross-Dressing
J. Edgar Hoover made cross-dressing big in the States, and now everybody's doing it. Eleven stories on the ordinary lives of people in different clothing.
Kayley’s Super Power
Kayley has a super power. The thing is, she's not exactly sure what it is, and she doesn't even know how to use it. A story by Kevin Fanning, illustrated by Sam Brown.
Kevin Fanning's Home Security Basics
Dangerous times call for drastic measures. From mental combat to homemade weaponry, a few good tricks to keep the bad guys away.
Since Your Father Tried to Kill You
You were disappointed when your father tried to kill you. All these years, you thought you had a good relationship, a Bob Saget-Candance Cameron bond. Then, disaster struck. Kevin Fanning sifts through the after-effects and offers consolation.