When in Rome
Experts answer what they know. The Non-Expert answers anything. This week we travel to Italy to settle the age-old question of doing or not-doing as Romans.
Kevin Guilfoile
Bienvenue au Musée Renteria
Like many modern painters, the extremely famous Renteria had issues with women. Our writer shares a guide he picked up at Renteria’s museum.
The Half-Assed Handyman
Are your screws loose? Is the house falling apart? Call the Half-Assed Handyman! KEVIN GUILFOILE walks us through proper fence gate repair and the best way to fix a lawnmower handle.
John Ashcroft's 2002 College Football Preview
Thanks to the 2001 PATRIOT Act, we can learn the dark secrets that lurk in the hearts of men. The time is upon us to take this information and put it to good use: predicting the 2002 college-football champions.
I Know You're Lonely for Words That I Ain't Spoken
Most people know that Bruce Springsteen has a new album out. But everyone knows that a man, shouting at Springsteen, partly inspired the new songs.
Spam Poet
Do you see that detritus in your inbox as fodder for verse? No? Then meet the Spam Poet, who takes everyday junk mail and turns stink into stanza. KEVIN GUILFOILE waxes poetically.
Surrey With the Syringe on Top
In the cutthroat world of playwriting, where a good line means the difference between fame and famine, many authors fall victim to the lure of performance-enhancing drugs.
What Are You, Drunk?
A new study on binge drinking from the Harvard School of Public Health slides off the stool, falls down, and admits that it really didn't know what it was talking about earlier, with all that "research" business.
Casual Fan Fiction
A story based on characters in the popular NBC drama The West Wing written by a guy who usually runs the vacuum between Ed and Law & Order.
The Mediator on Gay Marriage
Before arguments come to a head, they should come to The Mediator. Here The Mediator solves an issue rife with debate: gay marriage. KEVIN GUILFOILE reports on the new ground rules.