Get what you knead

The United States attacks two facilities in Syria used by Iran and Iran-backed groups, according to the Pentagon. / Al Jazeera

The White House says Russia is killing soldiers who fail to follow orders in Ukraine, also threatening entire units with death. / The Associated Press

A very long, very good assessment of China's current "era of malaise" by Evan Osnos. / The New Yorker

Over a million Paraguayans "disappear"—due to migration, smaller families, and more accurate census figures. / The Economist

Newly anointed House of Representatives speaker Mike Johnson gives Fox News a little clarity (we stress: a little) on his positions. / Politico

See also: "Oil And Gas Lobbyists Happy To Fill In Rest Of Nation On Who Mike Johnson Is." / The Onion

Death Valley national park reopens after being closed in August, and visitors are discovering sand dunes now dotted with lakes. / The Guardian

Eighteenth-century British naturalists relied on traders of enslaved people to obtain thousands of natural specimens from West Africa. / Lapham's Quarterly

Ideas about monstrosity are said to have been "fundamental to ancient and medieval debates about the nature of humanity." / Medievalists.net

Related: Jeanette Winterson on the future of ghosts in this age of the metaverse. / The Paris Review

(Personally, we're still haunted by an image of a massive oyster from last summer, icymi.) / X

The Paul Hollywood fandom—those who haunt the host of The Great British Baking Show on social media—is said to be the thirstiest. / GQ

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Your headlines are sourced and composed by Rosecrans Baldwin and Andrew Womack, Monday through Saturday.