McDonald's sucks, right? It makes you fat. The burgers are mediocre. It turns good American teens into pimply trolls who know nothing but the Fryolator. Fine. I'll give you all that. But give me this: McDonald's sells the best-tasting Diet Coke
ever. Cold, just sweet and bitter enough without an excess of aftertaste or carbonation. Maybe you're thinking: "Rrrr? Aren't all Diet Cokes the same?" You heartless bastard. You probably say that about snowflakes, too.