The Year That Was and Wasn’t
The past year has been bad—but what made it bad, more or less? To find out, we asked a group of writers and thinkers: What were the most important events of 2016, and what were the least?
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A collection of 142 issues
The Year That Was and Wasn’t
We asked writers and thinkers to tell us: What were the most important events of 2015—and what were the least?
My Letter From Oliver Sacks
Migraines, 3D magic, and an unlikely correspondence from one “incredibly stereoscopic person” to another.
Everything's Amazing and Nobody's Happy
Before he was America's favorite philosopher comic, he was just another comedian out on tour. And she was the journalist he wanted to meet.
My Date With Don Draper
The TV series Mad Men is set to begin its final season. Finally we’ll know how many women—and how much Proust—it takes to make Don Draper happy.
Big Time
When viral stardom strikes, your entire future is suddenly within reach—would you capture it or just let it slip?
Crazy in Love With Kansas
Brief updates on important stories that have tumbled off the front page—“Carry That Weight,” Brownbackonomics, the ice bucket challenge, homophobia in Russia, and more.
The World According to Brian Williams
A look back at the dethroned NBC Nightly News anchor’s storied history, in his own words.
The Apocalypse Will Be Televised
When the world ends, CNN won’t be the only channel with a doomsday video ready for broadcast.
Groundhog Days
In Woodstock, Ill., where “Groundhog Day” was filmed, hundreds of fans gather every year, year after year, to celebrate their favorite movie.
Kiss From a Mall Cop
Your party-conversation brief on the most important stories that no one’s talking about anymore—the plight of the Segway, internet child exchanges, Ebola, the current fortunes of Seal, and more.
This Will Be the Year That Was
If you can't wait to find out what 2015 will bring—from John Galliano's Cosby sweaters to Jenny McCarthy getting polio—wait no longer. (Spoilers ahead.)
Admirable Restraint
Understatement can help us cope with disaster. But in the case of Paul McCartney, a little doesn’t always go a long way.
Turnip for Hugh
Brief updates to news stories that have slipped off the front page. This week: Smoking lounges at Reynolds American, Hugh Hefner’s hibernation, and the financial disasters that are Olympic Games.
The Übersinner
Reddit's “Ask Me Anything” interviews—edited for the seven deadly sins—provide an Idolatry of Self so big, it produces Zen koans.
Glad I’m Not You
The instinct to applaud boot-strapping and the comeback kid is as American as apple pie. So why does schadenfreude make us feel so good?
This Will Be the Year That Was
At the dawn of 2014, we anticipate what will happen in our new year. This is what will happen.
The Year That Was and Wasn’t
We gathered writers and thinkers to consider everything that happened over the past 12 months and asked them: What were the most important events of 2013—and what were the least?
Wrestling With Andy Kaufman
The hoax at the Andy Kaufman Award show led to speculation the notorious comic faked his death—a joke that wouldn’t have been out of character. When a fresh-faced Glamour editor mingled with him the year before he died, Andy talked about disappearing.
My Brief, Binding Road
Since the closing down of Silk Road, the number of drug dealers selling online has increased nearly 50 percent. A former customer waits in fear, wondering why he used his real name.
The Complete Biography of North West
A baby is born to a celebrity couple. Meanwhile, many more babies are born to countless other non-famous couples. This is what happens next.
Sick and Famous
Colds and flus happen—but as pop stars, stage actors, and athletes know all too well, that's rarely enough of a reason to call in sick. How they cope when the show must go on.
I Shall Be Heard
Andy Kaufman performed for more than just laughs—in fact, his goal often seemed to be something entirely different. A budding comic chases Andy’s ineffable comedy.
A Supposedly Fun Thing I Will Probably Do Again
Yesterday morning, a plane landed at an airport. A man who was or was not a famous actor, and a writer who was or was not in love with him, stood on the verge of finally meeting. A Valentine's Day story for the romantic and/or foolish at heart.
Right Here Waiting
After frequenting a local haunt where nobody knows his name, a Chicago writer makes new friends, rips on Richard Marx online, and then suddenly lands a real live celebrity musician at their door.
This Will Be the Year That Was
Already 2013 has seen America drive off the fiscal cliff, only to freeze momentarily, then either reverse in mid-air or drop straight into the canyon—depending on how you look at it. Here's more of what to expect over the next 12 months.
The Year That Was and Wasn’t
We gathered writers and thinkers to consider everything that happened over the past 12 months and asked them: What were the most important events of 2012—and what were the least?
The Missing Bride
A bride disappears on her wedding day, never to be seen again—or will she? Continuing a grand TMN Halloween tradition, our writers and editors craft new endings to a familiar tale.
MarketStrong
After resigning in disgrace from the charity he helped found and losing his sponsorship with Nike, Lance Armstrong now must cope with the leak of his new memoir—excerpted here.
Here There Be Monsters
A professor teaches his students skepticism by instructing them to create hoaxes with the web as their laboratory.
Our Future National Pastime
Predictions for the baseball season ahead from someone who hasn’t paid attention to sports statistics since the 1992 Orioles.
This Will Be the Year That Was
As 2012 hatches, many face the new year with trepidation and excitement. Whose political fortunes will shine brightest? Were the Mayans right? Here are startlingly accurate predictions for the year ahead.
The Year That Wasn't
As much as 2011 was filled with noteworthy events, it was also littered with meaninglessly overhyped blips that, try as we might, we shouldn't forget. We asked our group of writers and thinkers: What was the least important event of 2011?
PAX Primer
Every year, tens of thousands of gamers descend on Seattle to attend a convention that began as a webcomic, and has grown into the epicenter of gaming culture. An account from this year's event, which encompassed nearly every imaginable game genre—and a few never before imagined.
Constitutional Monarchy for the Win
Preparing for Britain's big fat royal wedding, our writer undergoes a crisis of republicanism when labrador Ella questions his arrogance about the family that wears the crown.
What Is a Career Move
Following his triumphant appearance on Jeopardy, IBM's Watson supercomputer strikes a deal to replace Charlie Sheen on CBS's hit comedy Two and a Half Men.
How to Make Celebrities Fall in Love With You
If you tell Johnny Depp he’s hideous looking, he’ll think you’re the first person he’s met who sees past his physical appearance—and other lessons.
The Karma Bum
When Allen Ginsberg stayed with my family, we played video games and read together. But the harmony was broken when the yoga began. It wouldn't be the last time.
Impresario Seaman
Norman Seaman was one of New York’s great avant-garde supporters. In his biography, he said, John and Yoko would only get a chapter.
Movement for a Standstill
Jon Stewart’s Rally to Restore Sanity is bad for America, except for the America that buys or sells advertising time on Comedy Central.
How to Do Astrology
Those who can’t do, learn. In this installment of our series in which the clueless apprentice with the experts, we divine meaning from the heavenly bodies.
Being Nominated Is the Award
The allure of an awards show is not the thrill of victory, but rather the anticipation--and of course the potential for a handjob.
Bret Easton Ellis, Author Célèbre
Four digressions about obsession, venom, and life in a famous author’s orbit.
To Chelsea, and Climate Control, Cheers
From the awkward phase through the sweater phase to the riot grrrl phase and the New York phase, growing up with a First Daughter I’ve never met.
The Beaver Post-Production
No one knows what will happen to The Beaver, Jodie Foster's new film starring Mel Gibson, where Gibson plays a suicidal man whose life is changed by a hand puppet.
The Rough Cut
When you share your life with a reality TV editor, you learn that reality often winds up on the cutting-room floor.
Justice With a Tagline
When your publisher won't pay you for translating a popular German guide to anal sex, don't take the law into your own hands--take 'em to court. But which one?
Pomp and Consequence
Celebrity graduation speakers should dispense wisdom and entertainment, or cause a scandal. Our writer found eight who managed to provide at least two out of three.
Paul Is Death
While the most popular Beatles rumor turned out to be false, making the case for an even more dramatic revelation.
And Now a Few Minutes With Andy Rooney’s Homo Erectus Ancestor
What the kids call “Acheulean,” others call pretentious nonsense. And what’s up with fire?
To Will a Mockingbird
Fashions come and go, but names tend to stick around forever, even hippie ones.
I Cannot Accept This Award
Acceptance speeches are often great for moments of hubris and disaster. For anyone soon to win a prize, here's a template best avoided.
Is Rapper Kanye West Dead?
Suspicious lyrics and other clues suggest something may be amiss among the hip-hop royalty.
Annie Dillard and the Writing Life
Writers aren’t born, they’re made—from practice, reading, and a lot of caffeine. And sometimes tutelage.
How to Play Magic: The Gathering
Those who can't do, learn. In this installment of our series in which the clueless apprentice with the experts, we learn lands, creatures, and spells from Magic great Jon Finkel.
Letters to a Young Lawrence Welk
Before he became famous, Lawrence Welk was just another hoofer working for tips. Then he reached out to Rainer Maria Rilke.
You Are Not Cool
Supreme Court Justice Samuel Alito is known for writing colorful decisions, full of “gobbledegook” and even John Lennon quotes. But whatever his legal philosophy, one thing he isn’t is cool.
Replacing Things Lost
A diagnosis of breast cancer is mind-blowing. A mastectomy can be devastating. But for some women, reconstructive surgery offers a chance for a silver lining.
My Brief Wondrous Life
On Sunday night, Hollywood’s finest will clasp the man of their dreams to their chests. Ladies and gentlemen, meet Oscar.
Mindfuck Movies
Some movies inform. Some movies entertain. And some pry open your skull and punch you in the brain.
Ballad of a Thin Man
In a country so proud of its apple pie, there is an element of distrust for thin men.
Getting Over Sarah Palin
As Election Day draws near, it's time for us to acknowledge: There’s a good chance that soon we won’t have Sarah Palin to kick around anymore. Our writer consults the experts on dealing with withdrawal.
Food Network Kicks Its Programming Up a Notch
An adventurous new show proves you can’t boost your ratings without breaking a few eggs.
Hail Ira
Rosemary's Baby author Ira Levin died this week--and it wasn't a lousy book review that killed him.
Dianne Reeves
The jazz chanteuse talks about meeting a legend, experimenting with styles, and finding her own voice.
Keeping Up With the Corpses
When her friend moves into a house whose Halloween block party draws swarms of trick-or-treaters from all over LA, our writer visits, entering a dimension where the candy corn is organic and the ghosts have SAG cards.
Television: How Novel
People who hate television love to talk about it, not realizing they could be spending their time improving their minds--with novelizations. The best of the oeuvre, with and without Steve Urkel.
Misery Loves Comedy
Grief takes on many forms, though it's rare to hear about a sudden addiction to comedy clubs and Seth Meyers's political impersonations.
Random Acts of Kindness
Hilton’s latest “be hospitable” campaign has people all over reporting on the good deeds of others. With only 1,000 baht—and a little help from Jeremy Piven—a chance to pay it forward.
Walking Nicole Kidman
Meeting celebrities is easy—you just need a lure. An Upper East Sider and her retired racing greyhound pad around, spotting stars wherever they go.
Yolkin
You've read much about Boris Yeltsin's legacy this week. His biggest may be the mean little man in the Kremlin who's the butt of few jokes.
Run for the Hills
The world MTV depicts is anything but real. But we don't watch to escape, we watch because we can't look away.
The Day After the Morning After
Our story thus far: editor Drew Barrymore, who has been in an on-again, off-again relationship with reporter Vince Vaughn, is friends with copy editor Keira Knightley (who is smitten with sportswriter Matthew McConaughey)--that is, until a night of tequila shots.
The Lost Weeknight
Dismayed at the idea of collaborating with Vince, Drew needs cheering up. McConaughey orders the shots. A new episode in our fanfic series.
Consuming Obama
Barack Obama is riding a wave of enthusiasm, and though we sense his sincerity, there's little else we know about him. Considering the man everyone seems to think should be our next president.
Stakeout
Vince and Drew's romance fizzles when he begins stalking her neighbor. And back at CM HQ it's reflecting poorly on his work, while everybody else is busy filming segments for their new website.
Mock the Vote
A month after we asked our readers to create and photograph political campaign signs of their own making, here are our favorites. We announce the winners of our Encyclopedia Brown for District Attorney contest.
Bring Me the Head of Mickey Rooney
Staff changes are announced at the world's most famous magazine, and Drew is handed the axe and told to swing it.
Longing for the Sad Bastards
When did our angst-driven movie men get all tangled up in their apron strings? A screen history of damaged males.
But I Play One on TV
Saving lives is hard enough—what medical professional has time for significant romantic moments in the supplies closet? A lifetime of TV role models.
News Gone Wild
Pop quiz for the journalism students in the audience: What's an editor to do when her reporter is assaulted and the attacker, whom the reporter strikes back, turns out to be the story's subject?
Mel Gibson's Project Redlight
Given his recent legal troubles, Mel Gibson may want to put some of the upcoming projects from Icon Pictures, his film production company, on hold. Some of the movies we'll have to wait a bit longer to see.
God or No God
Is that a benevolent deity inside your briefcase or is Loki just happy to see you? Introducing the game show that's got Americans clutching their prayer books: It's God or No God with Howie Mandel! Atheists, watch out!
The Weathermen
Why are so many news shows so dully casted--except for the flamboyantly named superhero in front of the blue screen? The top 10 best-named weathermen currently rescuing the news.
Ferry Tale
The best realtors have personality, professionalism, and drive—Mike Ferry’s One-on-One training seminar is where they get it. Three days of ego crushing, dream building, and chasing the world’s greatest real-estate agent, Froy Cadelario.
To Live and Love in Beautiful Alabama
Erik Estrada wants us to buy land, Ron Popeil wants us to shoot our salad. Promising a better life—free of ills financial and otherwise—when infomercials air on a Sunday morning, the effect can be downright spiritual.
The Word You Dare Not Spell
Whatever Kaavya Viswanathan’s legacy, she has inspired us to take pleasure in others’ misfortune. And as there happens to be a word that means just that—schadenfreude—many writers have been more than happy to remind us of it.
Paris Hilton and the American Cannibal
In our continuing series, a profile of the pornographer who put Paris Hilton in your living room, and a fascinating look at “pseudo-events” in our culture and the media that can't get enough of them.
Some of This Is Made Up
Sharing your name with a celebrity can be frustrating, especially when the two of you pursue the same occupation.
The Cast of Blossom vs. Wu-Tang Clan
It's true that this year's South by Southwest music festival brought a number of unlikely musical pairings to the stage. Few were as unlikely as Joey Lawrence and Raekwon. (Whoa!)
Big in Finland
Conan O'Brien's recent comedy bits about Finland earned him that country's adulation; his trip there for a one-hour special--airing tonight--sealed the deal. What the unlikely matchup means for one writer's family.
Heeding the Lamplighter's Whistle
He's gone. He's been gone for some time. I'd still come running, though, at the very first note. Just one little round of the Masterpiece Theatre theme, and I'm all his, that little gas-lighting corporate mascot.
I'm Your Biggest Fan
There are many reasons to pepper a celebrity with fan mail: admiration, a sense of kinship, obsession, even boredom. Any are acceptable and all are believable—until you try to explain your motives to others.
Be Not Afraid
Between rescuing Joaquin Phoenix from a car wreck and dodging bullets during an interview, German director Werner Herzog leads a dramatic life. According to his private diaries, we shouldn't be surprised.
Bret Easton Ellis
While the publishing world freaks out over false memoirs, who better to speak about truth in writing than an author with the same name as his protagonist?
The Omarosa Experiment
Reality TV isn’t for the weak of ego, or the merely normal; to succeed, you must be “super-normal.” Talking to some of the industry’s most infamous offspring about their lives after the show—and the psychologists who were responsible for vetting them in the first place.
Mirror, Mirror
Reality television depends on charismatic contestants, and the Ganz sisters, a pair of identical-twin casting agents, are among its chief suppliers. The first article in a series on the hidden workings of reality TV.
If on a Winter's Night, Dave Coulier
For those who knew the wacky shirts were actually a comedian's armor. For those with an answering machine message that said "Hi dee ho!" For those who've ever been lost out there and all alone. Excerpts from the forthcoming Dave Coulier fan fiction anthology.
Reality Check
When a critic slams Bravo's new take on Battle of the Network Stars, our writer remembers what made the first one worth a do-over. As it turns out, while the show could be remade, it could hardly be revived.
Worried About Celebrities
Experts answer what they know. The Non-Expert answers anything. This week: Sudden weight loss and sudden engagements abound. We take to the streets to find out which Hollywood celebrity's out-of-control behavior is causing people the most anxiety.
You Only Act Once: The Lesser Bonds
Many actors have attempted to wear the mantle of 007—and many have had their licenses to kill revoked, and not just because of suspicious accents. Here are the reasons why they lost the coveted role, with grievances aired by cast and crew.
The Tour, Chapter Three
A national book tour means many cars, planes, handlers and book-signings. It also means a table of elderly Southern women with specific questions about fertility clinics.
The Tour, Chapter Two
If you make an ass of yourself on the Dennis Miller show, will anyone notice? If you don't acknowledge that Beyoncé is Beyoncé, will she care?
The Tour, Chapter One
Ever imagine reading to a cheering stadium of millions? How about a single, disinterested Barnes & Noble customer? It's one thing to write a book; it's another to publicize it.
Cameron's Physics, Tara's Slips
Experts answer what they know. The Non-Expert answers anything. This week we help two readers with vital questions of national security: Can cars backtrack mileage if driven in reverse, and who is responsible for forcing celebrities down our throats?
Diaries of Andy Warhol, Terrorism Czar
The White House has found trouble in recent weeks with its security appointments, so the president boldly takes a new approach. Our writer reports on Andy Warhol's installation as the ultimate (and silvery) homeland defense.
A Modest British American
When America is so despised around the world, it is too bad we’ve lost one of our best ambassadors. Our correspondent attends a memorial service for Alistair Cooke in Westminster Abbey and sees the 20th century’s greatest radio broadcaster remembered among the famous and the great.
Forever Changing
Arthur Lee—songwriter, social critic, and leader of ’60s rock band Love—is finally back after an extended absence. Our writer witnesses Lee and his newly re-formed band play their classic album, Forever Changes, in concert and talks to him about what it meant then and still means today.
Tanks for the Memories
America hasn't been the same since Bob Hope died. Now—at war around the world—when we need him most, who will challenge the pompous and self-righteous?
Untitled Fall Project
What to do when you and your sister are worth billions, on the brink of adulthood, and then your brand new movie flops? Go to college? Our Los Angeles reporter goes undercover to discover the starlets' new plans.
Reading With the Enemy
Looking for a challenge and a little affirmation, our writer tests his die-hard liberal beliefs and goes on an all-conservative-media diet for one month. Life on the Right side of the dial doesn’t turn out the way he expected.
Barking at the Gate
The White House Correspondents Association dinner is DC's biggest night--politicos mix with editors mix with celebrities, all very realalcoholik. It's also among the lowest points of journalism.
Reality’s Apprentice
Reality TV may seem a world away from real life, but what happens when Donald Trump’s “The Apprentice” moves in upstairs? Worse, what happens when it seems to be a sham?
It’s Not Phair
The early ’90s were a great time to be a female singer-songwriter; that is, if your name was Liz P-something. The former Zuzu’s Petals lead singer listens to a long-avoided album, and lays her axe to rest.
Great Oscar Gaffes
Every year we watch the nominations unfold, the awards change hands, and the speeches drag on. But we miss all the inappropriate jokes, drunk punches, and other such un-televisables. Here’s the moments Oscar wished he’d never seen.
Die Softly
Action movies may seem old hat these days, but they had to start somewhere. We go back to the pre-Schwarzenegger years, when a movie audience thirsty for speed and thrills could only turn to “My Dinner With André.”
Bright Nights, Big Mountains
The Sundance Film Festival may have a hard time maintaining its indie credibility, but as a magnet for celebrities there is little doubt about its powers. After a few days of film in Park City,our writer looks back.
Happy Endings
With today’s final taping of Friends, fans across the country wonder what’s in store for TV’s six pals. Will Rachel and Ross finally find romance? Will Joey’s career take off? Our writer is ready with spoilers for the final episode in May.
Crowning the Action
Mel Gibson's forthcoming movie, The Passion, has come under a great deal of fire, especially for something that nobody's even seen yet.
Freddy and Jason and Reese and Julia
Ahh, movie sequels: the perpetual bliss of knowing what happens next. But what if Hollywood runs out of old films for remakes, prequels, and crossovers? A plan that will save the movie industry.
The Pop-Off King
Though dancers occasionally kick one another, writers are alone among artists in using their craft to attack each other. A report on Stephen King's new decision to join the vipers.
Waiting for Aiken
Since 1989, anyone named after some variation of Urkel has lived a miserable existence.
Here She Is…Miss American Idol
Justin! Kelly! Justin!! Kelly!!!! A throng of adoring fans in Burleson, Texas, welcomes Kelly Clarkson and co-star at her hometown stop on their movie tour. Our writer witnesses the mayhem.
Unloading on The Matrix Reloaded
The first Matrix was cool, but this new one needed a bit more work before they let it out of the gate. An open letter to the Wachowski brothers.
Mess With the Bull, You'll Get the Horns
The hazing at Glenbrook North High School and that other story about disregard for journalistic propriety can find judgment in the college classroom.
Gone Missing
With so many people gone missing these days, what do you do when your loved one’s gone too? Hire a private detective, that’s what you do! Our writer is hot on a trail of stunning clues.
75,000,000 Toddlers Can't Be Wrong
Steve Burns, the former host of Nickleodeon's kids show Blue's Clues, has embarked on a new career path: musician.
Josh's Creepily Prescient Oscar Picks
It's Oscar time again. But before you drop your paycheck in the office pool on who will snag Best Supporting Whatever, peruse these dead-on predictions for the winners.
Starfucker
Meeting and interviewing (and yes, dating) the stars proves tiresome for even the most well-seasoned of celebrity-worshippers. The life of lies and junkets, however, makes for the best party conversation.
Super Bowl Ads: A Postmortem
It's been popular for years to say Super Bowl ads are more entertaining than the game, and the ad industry started the rumor. Unfortunately, the ad industry is prone to lying.
Happy New Year From Sam Nougat
The bringing of a new year suggests reconciliation, a time for us to forgive our relatives any faults from last year. Or, ask them to forgive us.
Joe Mitchell's Secret
Considered the best profile writer New York's ever seen, Joseph Mitchell's influence is unfortunately on the wane. Why today's prose-makers have lost their way.
To the Teen Beat of His Own Drummer
Maybe you only know him as "the other one" from Weird Science, but Ilan Mitchell-Smith is a former actor turned real human being (and Ph.D. candidate, no less).
Ads Are Stupid
A purple thing with eyes will make you buy cheeseburgers. Shaking rumps will make you buy beer. Bears are supposed to do something too.
Credit in the Straight World
In bad economic times, it’s hard to be picky about your job. Ex-Screw editor Jonah Cassidy is still writing, though now about petroleum, not porn.
Saturday Night Fever
“Saturday Night Live” has never been a gender-balanced show, just as it’s never been consistently funny. These days, things are starting to change.
Nothing's Shocking
Once upon a time, music idols were evil enough for your parents to hate them. So what do we have left, now that our demons are as safe as pie?
Surrey With the Syringe on Top
In the cutthroat world of playwriting, where a good line means the difference between fame and famine, many authors fall victim to the lure of performance-enhancing drugs.
The Minority Report Trailer
Big-budget movies require big-budget marketing, and you can bet every second of the trailer is accounted for, in impact. We get the inside scoop on Spielberg's new flop.
Casual Fan Fiction
A story based on characters in the popular NBC drama The West Wing written by a guy who usually runs the vacuum between Ed and Law & Order.
Oprah Cancels Book Club
The fate of literature has always been uncertain. In recent times the path seemed secure, guarded by Updike and Barnes & Noble totes. Then, disaster struck. Publishers crashed their Mercedes, agents sold their leather blazers. Inside the tragedy from within Oprah's private chambers.
Michael Chabon
Writer Michael Chabon answers the five questions, mentioning real estate, Mr. Terrific, and Ashtabula.