Headlines from January 24, 2006

New York's currently: asking how many candles you're burning
Canadian Conservatives defeat Liberals in yesterday's elections. Expat Americans in Toronto now swear they're moving to Australia.
You don't get 61 recorded instances of audience laughter by living in some weird, PR-obsessed White House bubble, that's for sure.
As politicians distance themselves from lobbyists, restaurants sit unfilled, glory walls go unadorned, but purple neckties are still OK.
Soldier on trial for interrogation death gets reprimand, forfeits pay and leave.
More and more, Republicans are lawmaking behind closed doors--with no Democrats present.
Castro questions U.S. stance on human rights, wants electronic signs removed from embassy exterior.
Russia says Britain has been using a fake rock to spy on them.
Republican leaders in Ocean County, N.J., grant domestic partner benefits to county employees.
Nominate your favorite novels for the 2006 Morning News Tournament of Books. Deadline is this Friday!
LEGO homemaker sets--for girls, you understand.
Want to find out how much your novel could be worth? Punch in the title here.
Because we knew there had to be some out there: List of American words not used in Britain.
Lou Reed to moviemakers: "They're all a bunch of whores."
Turkish writer Orhan Pamuk's case dropped.
Now that the Two Buck Chuck cometh to New York, here's what you need to know about Trader Joe's.
Any motion, anyone who moves in the zone, even if it's a three-year-old, should be killed.
Parents of kidnapped penguin make replacement baby.
Still not as cool as a hoverboard: Dean Kamen unveils new device that distills urine into water.
Want to lose weight? Learn to lose flavor.
American Heart Association says soy won't help your ticker; FDA says oh yes it does.
No mo lo?
Learn something every day: The way you're supposed to peel bananas.