Headlines from March 8, 2013

Highly sought al Qaeda militant—Osama bin Laden’s son-in-law—detained in U.S. operation in Jordan.
Ahmadinejad: “I have no doubt that [Chávez] will return alongside Jesus Christ…to establish peace and justice in the world.”
Pentagon required to find other methods of training Army medics than shooting goats and pigs.
UN report says some autism and rehab treatments—including some in the U.S.—are equivalent to torture.
Seventeen out of 18 major banks passed Fed’s annual stress tests.
Mississippi has America’s highest rates of teen childbirth and young-adult HIV; it also forbids contraception demonstrations in the classroom.
Various places considered “more British than Britain” assessed for actual Britishness.
When Merkel smiles on budget restraint, Britain claims victory; when she frowns on bankers’ bonuses, Britain is defeated.
Fewer people drinking heavily in the UK in the last five years.
“Neolexic portmanteaus”—e.g., chillax, techpreneur, bootylicious—have killed the great American pun. #opinions
“Desensitization” being applied as radical new treatment for children with severe food allergies. #longreads
List of the 21 comments you’ll find appended to every article ever published online about food allergies.
If you read contemporary fiction, and enjoy getting dirty with it, check out the ToB’s comments section. #tob13
Pablo Neruda’s body to be exhumed next month for murder investigation.
Study finds caffeine-laced nectar of some plants enhances the learning process for bees.
Stores “listen” for smartphones to figure out how many people are shopping.
Six lost David Bowie clips found on YouTube. #video
Meticulous study of global temperatures finds current levels warmer than at any time in at least 4,000 years.
Rand’s filibuster over drones yesterday may have been silly, but at least he had the guts to stand there and filibuster.
See also: Brief history of robot planes.
Forget drone strikes in America; we should worry over the steady encroachment of the anti-terrorist security state. #opinions
Coates: America is full of good, moral, racist people—after all, racism is at the heart of our society.
Thirty percent of girls in South Africa raped by the time they’re 18.
A woman’s chances of being killed by her abuser increase more than seven times if he has access to a gun—and other facts for shooting down pro-gun myths.
Egypt’s “Supermakh” helps young women avoid the pressing demands of strange Santa Clauses.
“Iowa City schools ask state for an audit,” and other messages from the weird side of Twitter.
Today in the Tournament of Books, Bernadette meets Orphan Master. #tob13
Author spends seven and a half pages thanking 140 people for contributing to her 172-page book. via
Infographic maps key moments in the history of the Heimlich maneuver.
Red Cross now recommends five blows to the back prior to the Heimlich for a choking victim.
Sale on McDonald’s french fries in Japan leads to public bingeing.
Columbia University students eat up to 100 pounds of Nutella per day; officials reluctant to also offer lobster tails.
Ex-Zuzu’s Petals lead singer finally gets around to listening to Liz Phair’s first record, and likes it. #tmn